Unwritten rules of life: the grocery store

-
We learn from a very young age that rules exist in every facet of our lives.  Rules govern the way we live within our own home and within our community.  We are told how fast we are allowed to drive, how long we can borrow library books, and the most putrid of all rules, how long we have to wait after eating before we go for a swim.
Personally, I am a rule follower.  Most likely it stems from having very strict parents, but I can’t help but think that most rules are set into place for good reasons.  Granted, some rules are meant to be broken because we’ve all eaten a hot dog and jumped in a pool.  But usually rules are there to keep us in line and living happily and safely as a group of humans cohabiting on this beautiful planet. 
Yet rules are a funny thing—often they are very in-your-face, like the sign on the door to stores that state you have to wear shoes and clothes to enter.  Other times, they are just not written for anyone to see.  These are the rules that should be ingrained in our minds so internally that there should be no need to actually have them printed.  These are rules we should follow without even thinking about them, making us kind and decent people.
But then I go into the grocery store and it appears that these basic rules of human nature simply aren’t there.  In a place where so many of us convene in order to nourish ourselves with necessities, it seems that the rule of common courtesy is out of stock or was somehow left in the parking lot.
So here are a few unwritten rules for the grocery store:
1.     Please do not use the self-check out if you have 75 items and are paying with small, crumpled bills.
2.     Please do not stand with your cart blocking the sour cream and talk on the phone for 5 minutes so that no one can make vegetable dip.
3.     Please do not stop your cart in the center of the aisle so that no one can pass in either direction.  Also, if you are happened to be stopped and see that you are obviously holding up traffic, actually move your cart to the side.
4.     Please do not open a can of an energy drink and leave it with the cereal.  It’s very unattractive, trust me.
5.     Please do not cut in line at the deli counter.  We all saw you, and we need salami, too.
6.     If you happen to pass someone you know, please chat politely and quickly, don’t look to see what is in their cart, and always remember: friends don’t let friends break unwritten grocery store rules.


Originally written/published 1.11.15.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Bedtime

-
            It is a cruel world we live in, when the time for sleep is never the time we want it to be. Ever.             There are, of course, exceptions, but speaking from my own personal experience, I’m not sure I’ve ever really been able to go to sleep exactly when I wanted. I can’t remember a single time (although I also can’t remember what I had for dinner last night) that I’ve had the pleasure of announcing, “I’m tired. I’m going to bed and no one or nothing is going to stop me.”             As tiny infants we know no better and haven’t yet adjusted to any sort of schedule. After living in darkness for all of our lives, we suddenly find ourselves with lights and sun and lovely people who are trying to train us to sleep at times when we really don’t want to, but aren’t sure why.      ...
Read more

Darn the first entry -- THE BOOTS.

-
I hope to, years from now, sift back through the archives to view the very first entry of this blog. And most likely, I'll be disappointed because reading things that you've personally written aren't quite the same as reading what someone else wrote. Just like coffee and salad always taste better when someone else makes it. It's one of those worldly mysteries that not even Nancy Drew could figure out. I'm starting this blog in lieu of my old web site which is now defunct because the whole economy is going somewhere in a handbasket. But this [free!] alternative gives me one great place to post everything and anything I want, combining my old blogs, SmallTownSoup.blogspot.com and OutdoorMama.blogspot.com. But to put something of substance in this first entry of this new blog, I thought I'd tell a bit about the boots you see in the logo. This photo was taken before Annie was big enough to wear shoes, so there's only two little boots following mine. Toby's a...
Read more

Pepe le Pew and Cupid, too

-
            Phenology is the study of seasonal natural phenomena, especially in relation to climate and plant and animal life. Watching the way nature changes with the calendar can be a neat way to track the world and make ridiculous comparisons and conclusions about fragrant animals, diapered babies and bow and arrows, and old cartoons characters with a French accent.             Living in Ohio, we never know what the weather in February will bring. We can assume snow, but even the most astute student of phenology will tell you that weather (not climate) is not what makes most things in nature happen.             So I go to two reliable signs of February: Love and skunks.             I’m sure everyone will agree that February is the month of love, with the whol...
Read more